Relationship issues – Do you value them for what they are?

Lately i have had a lot of friends go through relationship issues. These have been of varying degrees depending on the relationship. From little annoyances to full blown arguments bringing healthy relationships to the brink of ending.

Now, i by absolutely no means have any issue with these issues beign discussed with me as if they are then we are most probably pretty good mates and therefore im more than happy to hear them out and give them whatever advise i think is necessary.

BUT – the whole idea of asking relationship advise from a man who has been single for over 5 years, who’s longest relationsip was a year (and who took over3 times the length of that relationship to cope with it ending), always seems a little crazy to me. A man who falls in love purely on feeling, and not on reality of the situation.

This last one may sound a little strange but so often we like someone or feel attracted to them but shun it off and not allow it to grow or further it, because they are too young, or too old, or too some other thing. Isn’t love ALL about feeling? Isnt it about finding that person that gives you goosebumps just by being in their presence? About finding the person who makes you a better person without either of you even trying? None of this has anything to do with practicality, none of this has to do with how old a person is, or what they do for a living, or how much money they have…… This is all about the way someone makes you feel.

Isnt it?

ANYWAY – As for the advise, this is what i think about relationships.

If you complain about the fact that your partner is overbearing, that your partner hogs the TV, that your partner does this or doesnt do that, just think – i would LOVE to have someone to have an argument with about this stuff.

Right now i would rather have someone support what i am doing 50% of the time, someone to hog the bedsheets every night, someone to NOT cook dinner every now and then, than to have no one to support me 100% of the time, no one to share my bedsheets with, and no one to cook me dinner EVER.

Whenever you complain that your partner doesnt tell you they love you enough. Or that your partner doesnt hold you at night, or that your partner doesnt spoil you or make you feel special enough, Think about this.

Its been 7 years since i have heard those three words with that meaning.

Its been over a year since anyone has held me at night.

Its been over 5 years since i had a boyfriend to spoil me OR for me to spoil.

Now dont take this post as a pity me, poor little me, i have it hard sort of post. Because its not and i dont. I have amazing friends and i have an amazing support network to fill the gap. But every now and then i would love to have someone to argue with about stuff that only means anything in a relationship.

Arguements about the things above and other stuff like it means that you have someone. You have someone that cares. They may not say it, they may not show it, but they are there. Just because its an argument, doesnt mean its all bad.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: