How much is that dignity in the window? (Facebook repost)

I have always been a person that has the ability to look inside myself and see what my issues are. For a long time i was too scared to actually do it. But i always COULD do it if i needed to. And i did many times. When i was 21 i was forced, almost literally, to face what i had spent alot of time not facing. And the strangest part of it all is that that thing that i had to face was the thing i should have known better than anything: ME.

Once i did this and realised that i had NO idea who “me” was, i decided that the only way to discover this was to strip back, purposely and quite conciously, the multitude of walls and covers and protections that i had built up without knowing, until i felt like an empty. Once i got to the point (over many years. This was slow, painful process) where everything that was left, i understood and felt comfortable with, two things happened. I felt empty. But i felt free. For the first time in many many years i knew who i was. There wasnt much of me, but i knew it intimately. Over the next few years i tried, unsuccessfully, never to lose sight of who i was. To never build another wall, to never be dishonest about who i was and what i believed. But while doing this, build the empty shell into a real, honest and confident person. The person i was before i lost myself. Its taken many years so far. Many more than i would ever expected it to take. But i have also realised that its a project that will never, and should never, end. That we are constantly changing. That, although it is hard, we need to continually be introspective. And constantly be brave and honest enough to face who we are. Who we really are.

Although it was a hard process it has absolutely allowed me to know myself well. And not just know myself but UNDERSTAND myself. If something does arise that i dont understand, i know i can question instrosepctively and get the answer that i need. Once i have retrieved that answer i can decide whether i need to change the trait that has allowed that thing to arise or i need to embrace it and understand it. THEN just do it.

During this process i realised one thing. One thing that i had heard a million times but never truly understood. One thing that was a massive turning point that changed fundamentally who i was.

No one person is any more important that any other single person. Not you, not the person next to you, not the richest, most powerful or most beautiful person in the world, and absolutely not me.

We have all heard it. We have all said it. But how many of us actually realise it? How many of us actually realise this on a day to day basis?

How often do we conciously think about how what we are doing, while stuck in our own little universe, will effect others. From the little things, like not staying left on an escalator or walking side by side with four of our friends (in OUR own little universe) and therefore blocking the pathway for everyone else, to bigger things like forgetting common courtesy on a busy train just to catch up 5 seconds on your trip home, or driving at high speeds on the roads just to get to our destination 30 seconds sooner?

Since when has the price of time been respect? Is the potential life of another person, or your own really worth 30 secs longer at your destination? Is getting home 5 secs earlier really worth pushing and shoving hundreds of other people in peak hour, who are in exactly the same situation as you, and in the process your dignity and respect?

Are we really that busy? Do we really think we are more important that everyone else on that train, that we turn into beasts and forget basic human respect?

Since when has the price of outward success been inward satisfaction? Are you doing what you love to do? Or are you just doing what you have to to pay the bills? When did this become OK? When did we let ourselves believe that it was OK to not be satisifed as long as it appears on the outside that we are?

Has our need for acceptance come at the cost of our own self worth and satisfaction? Is external acceptance really worth anything if we dont accept ourselves? Does ANYTHING have worth if we dont value ourselves?

If you could do ANYTHING at all, something that would make you get up in the morning completel satisfied what would it be? Are you doing it? If not, why not? If the answer is money or fear or even worse “I dont know”, then when did you trade self satisfaction for a financial price or for fear? And how much will it cost to get back?

As i mentioned before, this is an ever constant project and there is always a time that we can look inside ourselves and find something, regardless of how small or big that can be looked into further and understood more or removed from our thinking or personality.In saying this we can get to a point where we are truly confident in who we are and can provide ourselves with everything that we need mentally. Once we are at this point an amazing and beautiful thing happens:

We become invincible. No one can ever take this away from us. Unless we let them. We no longer need external gratification to feel whole. External gratification becomes an extra little bonus. Imagine never NEEDING anyone to make you whole. Imagine only having people in your life that you WANT in your life and not having to keep someone in your life because they fill a little hole you feel inside of yourself! Imagine being able to be YOU all the time and having nothing to hide. From anyone. THAT is total freedom.

With total freedom comes lack of stress. If you are completely in tune with who you are, then you are not reliant on any person or any situation to keep you feeling whole which in turn allows you to easily remove yourself from the stress.

This isnt to be confused with being completely feelingless. In fact the opposite is what it is all about. Being completely immersed in living life to the fullest. Enjoying EVERY moment, whether it is stuck in peak hour traffic or doing something you love with someone you love. If you know yourself you will build a life that is perfectly built for you.


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